Painted
by Clyde-chan
Summary: They didn’t know he watched over a broken girl as she painted lines of red on her flesh and wiped them away with a glow of green. -Itasaku- -Graphic content!- -angst warning- -minor OOCness and spoilers for those who have not read chapter 397 and on-
1. Prologue

**(A/N) I've had this in my computer for a while and I'm finally deciding to post it due to my absence. I'm sorry for not being able to update my other Itasaku stories, so here's one to fill the void. It will be divided into about seven chapters (excluding the prologue)**. **The story is set to Painted by Evans Blue, coincides with the AMV I made to it, and will be divided according to the lyrics. Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters no matter how hard I try.**

**Painted**

**Prologue**

_Hold your colours against the wall  
When they take everything away  
Hold your colours against the wall  
Soaking through  
(With me)_

"Ita-chan!"

Said Uchiha looked over his shoulder at the young girl with pink hair and bright green eyes, smiling with innocence only she possessed. Having kicked off her tiny shoes, she stepped into the house as if she lived there.

"Where's Sasuke-kun?"

Itachi smiled. "He's at the training grounds. He'll be back soon."

Sakura sulked and he patted her head, ruffling her already messy hair.

"Can I wait here?" she asked, cheering up in a matter of seconds.

"Of course," Itachi said. He turned back around to attend to something else.

Sakura watched for a few minutes. "What are you doing?" she finally asked.

Itachi held up a washcloth littered with manifold holes and sighed. "Cleaning."

Sakura giggled at the thought of the great Itachi Uchiha, recently made ANBU captain, cleaning his house with an old rag.

"Why do you want to see Sasuke?" the unwilling maid asked.

Itachi didn't need to question her. It was apparent when she blushed.

"B-because I want to!" she said fiercely to cover her embarrassment. Calming down she said," I just wanted to tell him what happened."

Itachi put the cloth down. "What happened?"

"Well, there's this girl Ami, and she's really mean!" Sakura exclaimed, using plenty of hand gestures. "Today, she was making fun of everyone."

"Maybe Ami has some issues at home," Itachi said. He thought about what he could say to her to make her understand that Ami was not an evil person.

"I want you to remember this," he said, finding the words. He bent down so he can meet her eyes. "The world isn't black and white. There are a lot of colors in between. Good people and bad people don't exist. Most of all, it isn't just life or death; it's everything in-between."

-

**(A/N) The lyrics at the beginning are from Hold Your Colour by Pendulum. I believe the prologue deserves a song.**

**Don't stop reading if the prologue is suckish. I promise it gets better (coughliescough). Hehehe. But really, this is just an introduction. Everything is welcomed, including flames. I'm in the mood for s'mores. Next chapter will be up soon!**


	2. Stolen Release

**(A/N) I said I'd update soon. This will be an easy story to write, so expect quick updates. Just a fair warning. IF YOU DO NOT LIKE SELF-MUTILATION OR BLOOD, TURN BACK NOW! I MEAN IT! So don't complain to me if you think this chapter was gross or sad. **

**Disclaimer: God hates me. I mean, I do not own Naruto! Hehehe… Yeah, I'm pathetic.**

**Painted**

**Stolen Release**

_If I could find the time to speak  
I'd try to find a thousand ways to prove you wrong  
Falling on my face  
I'm chasing all the lines of your skin  
And all your pirouette mistakes  
So dance until you're brand new  
Ignore the fight inside that scares you_

Sakura didn't wince as the blade sunk into her flesh. She didn't cry when blood bubbled to the surface as if it had been restrained from doing so. There was no pain as she contemplated going a bit deeper this time, digging into the most vulnerable part of her wrist. She'd disappear from this world, with only a useless shell lingering to remind those that remained of her past existence. It was comforting to know no one can forsake her in death, and it was enough to tempt her. She poised the kunai where her hand meets her wrist, letting the tip touch the protruding blue vessel. If she pressed any harder, it would delve into her skin, successfully severing both the vessel and her life.

As usual, she could not bring herself to do it. Instead, she started to heal her marred arm so the cuts would vanish. No one knew of what she was doing to herself, thanks to her healing abilities. There were only slight marks, all of which were undetectable to the naked eye. She looked into the bathroom mirror, pushing a lock of hair behind her ear. It no longer frightened her how dull her eyes were as she stared into the stained looking glass. There was no more spirit in the green irises; they no longer held the fire her village prided itself in. Her hair had also dulled, as if it also held a sort of spirit. The tresses were no longer a bright, shocking pink, but a pale, muted imitation of a once recognizable mane. Her body was frail, for she no longer trained; what would be the point when she wanted to disappear?

After her skin reattached itself, she walked out of the bathroom that smelt of blood and into her room. She had gotten an apartment when she turned eighteen as a birthday present to herself (_no one else could give it to her_). It had been six months since then, and she enjoyed the privacy it provided her. Pulling back the covers of her bed, she climbed in and immediately collapsed, letting darkness envelop her and trap her in a dreamless, uneasy sleep.

-

Itachi gazed at the frail form of the girl, his red eyes illuminating the darkness. Merely a window separated them, and yet they couldn't be further apart. Millions of unseen windows divided the two, all stained with blood and lies. He stood on a branch with a balance only he could perfect watching the sluggish movements of her chest. The girl's breaths were small, and her sleep was troubled as it was every night. He would do anything to ease her pain, but it was not possible for him to give her pleasant dreams; he was only capable of providing darker, more frightening nightmares. She rolled over in her sheets, pushing herself into a ball to protect her subconscious from the nightmares that were all too close.

It seems the night only makes it worse, he thought as he looked at her revealed wrists. He didn't see the marks, but knew they were there, hidden under skin and bone.

The Akatsuki did not know where he was; they never knew where he went at night. They didn't know he watched over a broken girl as she painted lines of red on her flesh and wiped them away with a glow of green. Her arms became an aberrant canvas at dusk. They weren't aware of him watching her as she slept, writhing in her sheets with anxiety that was too formidable for her to control. The Akatsuki knew nothing about Sakura and Itachi made sure they never would.

-

Sakura walked into the hospital, looking down at the floor. She had never done that before. She had always held her chin up high to show how strong she was (_because she was always strong_). They waved and she smiled uselessly back. They worried; she continued to make them do so. She was trapped, and she made sure she could never find a way out. She _wanted _to be ensnared in her Hell.

The patients she dealt with were easy. They complained and she healed. It was mechanical, and she liked it that way. As long as they kept their mouths closed around their sob stories, she was perfectly fine. The older ones were the worst. They incessantly prattled about their life and their family and didn't realize her hold on the clipboard tightened. She'd tell them to stop talking in her mind, but didn't have the strength to say it aloud. They didn't realize that all she wanted to do was get the day over with, so she could continue to stagnate in her house.

They didn't care.

The patients sobbed and spoke, making her stomach wrench. They never stopped. She remained silent, feigning to listen. She used to want to hear these stories. She used to think they were human and tragic. Now that she was tearing herself apart, she didn't need to hear others trying to pull themselves back together. When she returned home, she saw the picture.

It was standing upright.

Sakura wanted to get rid of it. Team Seven's faces stared at her, as if blaming her for everything that happened. There was too much in that picture. There was a sort of hope that accompanied childhood (_hope she no longer had_). She turned it down every day, but didn't get rid of it. She was too weak for that. As she put it back down, she wondered why it was revealed in the first place.

She went into her kitchen to make dinner, but when she opened her drawer, found all of the utensils gone. It disturbed her, but she put a meal in the microwave anyway. After going though more mechanized rituals (_eating, cleaning, breaking_) she went into the bathroom. The blade wasn't in its place beside the sink. She checked the floor, and then the rest of the house. It had disappeared. Her weapon pouch had gone missing, too, along with any form of sharp materials she possessed.

"What are you looking for?"

The voice tore at her soul, and when she walked into her bedroom, the face shredded her already broken heart. She didn't say his name, not even in her mind. Sakura didn't accept it. He was not sitting in her room, as nonchalantly as if he lived there. There was pain, but she held it down. She promised herself never to cry again, and she was not going to break it after all this time (_even if the past came back to her in the cruelest way imaginable_).

"I would ask how you are feeling, but this," Itachi held up the blade," answers my question."

Sakura didn't move. "What are you doing here?"

He stood from the chair, still behaving as if he belonged there. He didn't answer. The murderer had no reason for being there. He would say he wanted to help her, but what could he do? Tell her everything was going to be okay? It wasn't, and she knew that. Besides, he was an expert at hiding; he wasn't going to reveal himself just because a girl he used to care about was slowly destroying herself.

"You took the knives and the kunai," Sakura stated slowly, weakly. "What do you want?"

"I want you to tell me why you are doing this to yourself."

She looked at him almost innocently. "Doing what?"

Itachi didn't take kindly to people who thought they could fool him. "Killing yourself."

Sakura gestured with her hands. "I'm alive, aren't I?"

Itachi's face told her that there was no point in lying. He could see into her even without those hellish eyes, and what he saw would have broken his heart if it had not already been torn in half that night. She put her hands down and looked away. There was no escaping the fact that he knew.

"Every night, I watch as you cut your arms," he said.

She bristled. "Why?" Sakura asked.

Itachi didn't speak; he only did so when necessary. Even if he did feel the need to blabber pointlessly, he still couldn't give an answer. The only thing he could think of was that he still felt an absurd attachment to her. He felt that maybe (_maybe is such a useless word_) he could save her. He was still a fool.

"Leave."

Sakura didn't look at Itachi, but at the floor. He didn't argue, only disappeared as she wanted. She couldn't sleep that night. Instead, she looked for some sort of sharp object. Itachi was thorough. He cleaned her out and she lost the only release she had. He had removed her drug, and she felt alone without it. She was hollow again, and all she wanted to do was breathe like she used to.

She just wanted to be fixed.

-

**(A/N) Yummy angst. It's a short chapter, I know. Deal with it. Any complaints, tell me. I know you have many. Uh…review for…Halloween candy. Yes, I still have some.**


	3. To Be Here Again

**(A/N) The update was a bit later than usual. Sorry, I was sidetracked. ADHD, and all that. Anyway, this is another short chapter, but I didn't want to overload it with too much. So yeah. Plain and simple. Enjoy**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Painted by Evans Blue.**

**Painted**

**To Be Here Again**

_Look before you end it all.  
Look before you shut your eyes  
For the last time.  
There's no more room to go back down.  
Your picture trends in black and white  
(I will show you)  
I will show you what it's like._

-

His face clawed its way into her mind during work. It remained the entire day. Sakura couldn't begin to comprehend why he had visited her. He wasn't supposed to be in the village, let alone her room.

Her patient was one she hadn't seen in years.

"Well, Sai, what is it today?" she asked monotonously.

"I have a bruise on my cheek and a wound on my side," he stated, just as monotonously.

The two were quite alike, only Sai did not have any emotions to suffer from. He knew not to ask her why she hadn't been showing up for training. Even after Naruto left and Kakashi was killed, Yamato and the two still trained. Then Sakura's world collapsed when Ino died, and she stopped altogether. On that day, another piece of her was torn from her body and she was left to bleed.

"I have a painting to show you," Sai stated as Sakura's hands healed.

He nodded over to the corner of the room, where the orderly who brought him in must have placed it. She looked at it for a second. There were no colors, only a black and white landscape. It was good, but not of Sai's quality.

"Different," was all she said.

Sai smiled as he always did. "I know."

Sakura stole a glance at it again. Black and white. It was a beautiful concept, one she has learned to live with. Unfortunately, Itachi's words were called forth. _The world isn't black and white_. To her it was, and she didn't need him to prove her wrong. She was fine with the monochrome view she had.

Sai slept after she was finished. He looked peaceful, but she didn't notice. She just continued to work. At the end of the day, she walked home alone in herself. Hesitant to step into her apartment, she stood out in the cold a few moments. Winter was coming. She could tell. She didn't mind it, though. Walking in, she saw Itachi on her living room couch. He would remain despite her pleas.

"How long did you wait?"

He looked at her, but didn't answer.

"How long will you stay?"

He didn't answer. She didn't talk. They just stared at each other, wondering what the other wanted (_needed_). They were both lost, and it was a welcoming numb.

"Sit," Itachi said.

Sakura didn't argue, even though it was her apartment. She should be commanding him, but she didn't have the energy or the nerve. She was reminded of his killing spree and felt a bit of hate crawl up in her throat. It's the first thing she's felt in a while. If he wasn't a killer and she wasn't broken, they might have had a normal conversation. However, it was not the case. They didn't ask any questions. They just looked at the fuzz on the television screen. It hummed in their heads.

_Black and white._

The little beings that moved spasmodically across the screen were black and white, and beautiful. They entranced her and pulled her in. The numbness buzzed. She felt her hand being taken. She looked at Itachi. He looked at her wrist. It was covered in new marks that she hastily tried removed.

"You'd even do it in a hospital," Itachi said.

Sakura was almost walked in on. She tried her best to erase the cuts, but they were still apparent.

"It doesn't matter," she said.

Sakura pulled her arm away. She didn't like his touch. It reminded her of the past. He still had those gentle hands he used to stroke her hair with. They didn't feel like the hands of a murderer.

"Of course it doesn't," he said mockingly. He thought her a fool.

"What do you want?"

"I want you to look around."

He didn't say he wanted to help her. He didn't say he could. He just wanted her to realize what was left.

"What do you mean?" Sakura asked.

"You don't see how far you have gotten," he replied, staring at the screen. "You only see how far you _should _have gotten."

"Why do you care?"

She was right. Why did he care? He still felt she was a child, just like his little brother. She still felt like she was his to protect. He was a fool, too. He could never protect her and shouldn't even want to.

Sakura no longer cared for his answer. He was taking too long. So they just sat and watched the static, content to roam inside their minds.

-

Sakura made her decision, and it was one she approached with intrepidness. Itachi's appearance was the last straw. She looked at the syringe filled with anesthetic. It was suiting. Anesthetic was used to save the patient from experiencing pain; she was going to use it to erase it altogether. She pushed up her sleeve and placed the tip of the needle to the vein jutting from her elbow. In the supplies closet, no one could see her.

"There's no more room to go back down, so I suggest you remove that needle."

The syringe was taken from her hand. She looked up at Itachi.

"Are you following me?" she asked. Her tone was hollow as ever.

"Perhaps," was all he said.

What he didn't say was that he had to, not only because she would do something stupid (such as inject her body with too much anesthetic), but because he worried. It was dangerous for him to do that, but he couldn't help that she was a danger to herself. Even if he had to watch her crumble and fall, he'd be there, desolate and waiting.

"Why did you stop me?" Sakura asked. To her surprise, her voice was shaky. Only a bit. "You wouldn't have to worry about me anymore."

_I choose to worry about you_, Itachi wanted to say. However, something stopped him. It was the look on her face. She was trying to be strong, holding herself together by crossing her arms. He could tell she wanted to be strong again, and having him worry about her didn't help. Sakura would have someone to depend on, and what she needed was to depend on herself.

"You're going home," Itachi said instead.

She looked at him. Apathy was all he saw. He left, and even though he wasn't there, she knew he was watching her. He would know whether she stayed or not.

She left.

-

Sakura went to bed without releasing her pain. There was no way to empty her mind. The fear twisted her stomach and her memories. They haunted her, these images of what once was. Tsunade's crumbling face entered her mind's mirror, and she opened her eyes. Itachi was sitting in that chair.

"You're a very annoying plague," she said. She didn't sound annoyed.

He stood and walked over to the bed. "Tell me, why have you given up?"

"What do you mean?" she asked. It was useless. She knew what he meant. "I've been left behind my entire life. Everyone I love…everything I know. It all disappeared."

"Not all of it," Itachi said.

The meaning of that simple sentence rand through her conscience. "Does it matter?" she asked, a bit of pain entering that hollow voice.

He didn't respond, but turned to leave. Her hand clutched his cloak.

"Stay."

Itachi sat in the chair. He didn't care why she wanted him to stay. Maybe she was trying to pull herself together, or maybe she wanted to see if he would. Either way, he remained a statue in the room, forever standing.

He wanted to tell her what it was like to be painted, to be whole. He wanted to show her what it was like.

_To be here again_.

-

**(A/N) Itachi is starting to seem like Big Brother. Sorry, I just read 1984. Great book. Anyway, if you're confused what it means by 'to be here again', Itachi wants her to be back to herself, and not in her sick world. How romantic. Some may say he's out of character, but he's not the bad guy we all used to think he was. Sorry for the short chapter, but yeah. Deal with it. ;) Review for fried chicken. I love fried chicken…**


	4. Beauty in the Eyes of a Killer

**(A/N) Uh…don't know what to write for this one because my brain is pretty much fried. This is a pretty emotional chapter, so beware. Um…enjoy? Yeah, that's it.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Painted, or Evans Blue.**

**Painted**

**Beauty in the Eyes of a Killer**

_Let them say all that they want_

_I'll wipe away your painted wings_

_Till your heroes come_

_If you doubt it'll look so new_

_Then the venom in your eyes _

_Will control you_

"You look pathetic."

The words came from Ami, who was in the hospital with a few minor injuries. She had become a great kunoichi after taking an apprenticeship to Ino, despite her hate for the girl. Sakura couldn't tell if she was upset over her death; the woman was good at displaying a hateful façade.

Sakura didn't say anything. It wasn't worth it. They both knew she was right.

"You've heard the rumors, right?"

Ami was becoming increasingly sadistic as Sakura set her broken arm. Still no answer. It encouraged Ami.

"They say you want to kill yourself."

She snapped the splint. Ami looked pleased with herself.

"Do you know why I'm telling you this?" This time, she didn't wait. "All of these years, you've had an ego as big as your forehead. I'm glad that you've finally realized how weak you really are. I bet everyone else is happy that you stopped pretending to be strong. We all know that being Lady Hokage's apprentice didn't change anything."

She never stopped. Her words encompassed an epoch and consumed her mind. She realized the truth scared her more than anything. She didn't want to hear all of her mistakes and her broken pride.

"Sakura, I'll take over."

"Lady Hokage!" Ami practically shouted her name.

The woman smiled weakly. She walked over to the bed, her cane gently taping the floor with each feeble step. _Click, click, click_. The sound remained in Sakura's memories. It was a sound of weakness, of despair. It was a sound that made the world broken. The Hokage was a shell, and the cane only emphasized that.

"No, you don't have to," she said.

She didn't want to see the Hokage like this. Just like Ami's vehement words, it scared her. She was just a scared little girl, thinking that since her mentor was crumbling, so was her village. The medic's strength had come from the now-weak woman.

"Do you want me to kick your ass?!" the Hokage asked.

Tsunade still had her spirit. It made Sakura even more afraid. She bowed and left the room. A cloud of ANBU filled the hall, and she looked at them resentfully. Tsunade didn't need so many guards before. She ran away from them and ended up in the storage room. She felt the tears, but refused them and as she sat on a box, she fell into herself. Ami was a better person than she ever hoped to be, and it made her feel even weaker. She was even feebler than the Hokage.

For once, she wished Itachi was there with his darkness and indifference. He never showed. He wanted her to work this out on her own.

-

At home, Itachi had prepared a dinner. He wasn't a very good cook. She guessed it was because he never had to prepare a delicious feast for a feeble girl. She was thankful to have something hot to eat. They sat across from each other silently, but not awkwardly. He asked nothing, and she answered nothing. They were a content couple.

"You listen to them, don't you?"

The question tore the silence gently, as if not wanting to make it disappear. Sakura looked at Itachi.

"I don't have a choice. I hear them when I go out, and their whispers…they hurt more than the cuts."

Itachi didn't touch the food. It was all hers. "You should ignore them."

He managed to anger her, even though she was trying to make all of her emotions fade. "You don't know what it's like," Sakura said, her voice bordering on a growl. "Don't preach to me as if you know everything."

Itachi knew she wasn't going to eat. She was killing herself, and sustenance would only keep her alive. He took away the uneaten food and said," I'm not preaching."

He would give her all the wisdom of the world if only he knew it. If he knew how to preach, then he would. However, he couldn't help her before helping himself. He could only stay as she said.

There was a knock, and Sakura went to answer it. As soon as she opened the door, a pair of arms flung around her.

"I've missed you, Sakura."

She stared behind him, not moving, not breathing. She convinced herself that he wasn't there, that his arms weren't around her. _This isn't real_, she thought. _He's not here, and I'm not here, and this is just a nightmare._

"Sakura?"

The voice and the body felt too real. It was then she had to tear herself from the denial and face that the person in front of her was there, with concerned blue eyes and wild blonde hair.

"Naruto, you're…"

She couldn't say anything. Naruto thought it was because she was overwhelmed with happiness. He was as dense as ever.

"Can I come in?" he asked, his smile too painful to look at.

She looked away. "I…just need some time."

He understood and walked out of the threshold as she closed the door. She would need a lot of time. She would need forever.

-

Sakura laid in her bed, trying not to let the emotions take over her. There was so much anger, and so many memories, she didn't know what to do with them. Why did he decide to come back after so many years? Surely he didn't expect her to welcome him back with a cheerful smile and open arms.

"Are you going to forget about him?"

Itachi was there, in that chair. He wouldn't go away, and strangely, she didn't want him to.

"I'll try," she murmured.

She'd been trying for so long just to not think about it anymore. She just wanted the memories to leave, and not trouble her with their happiness. The edge of her bed dipped down as Itachi sat on it.

"And what if you can't?"

Sakura didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to acknowledge everything she tried to forget. She just wanted everything to disappear. Itachi wanted to tell her to listen to Naruto. To forgive him. But he knew his words wouldn't help. He knew that he couldn't be her savior, if only for a little while. He'll just try to stop the pain until someone else can successfully help her. Maybe that someone was her. He wouldn't know.

All he could do was remain with her and try to convince her not to give up. He wanted her to see the world as it was, with colors and hues and brilliant shades. He wanted her to care. All he could do was watch her break and mourn and fall into a thousand pieces before him.

-

Naruto was at the hospital the next day. He was uncomfortable, standing there with flowers. When Sakura walked in through the doors, he held them out to her.

"I'm sorry," he said.

What he didn't say was what he was sorry for. Sakura didn't take the flowers and walked away, not willing to talk to him. He followed.

"Listen, I never meant to-"

"What?!" she asked, letting her mask crack. "Leave without telling me where the hell you were going? Come back without a damn explanation as to why? What did you never mean to do, because I sure as hell want to hear your sorry excuses."

She walked away, feeling something new inside her. It was fury and it felt good.

-

Sakura didn't see Itachi when she got home, and didn't really notice. There was something inside her, something that pushed past the defenses she put up. Naruto gave some sort of rebirth to her. For once, she didn't need to tear open her skin and bleed. She felt anger within her, and she let it stay for a while, making its home inside her chest.

-

Itachi knew eventually the Akatsuki would interfere.

"You know your mission," Pein said, his hologram flickering like a candle. "You need the bijuu within Naruto."

His own hologram was steady. "Yes."

In reality, he was pondering what happened that day. Sakura had erupted at Naruto, and it was all the blond could do not to let his jaw hit the floor. He could tell she needed him, even if he only gave her pain. At least he gave her something. He wasn't sure if he wanted to take that away from her.

He returned to her house to find her asleep on the couch, probably after watching the fuzz on the screen again. She really needed that fixed. Not finding a blanket anywhere and not wanting to move her, he unclasped his cloak and draped it over her. He sat down in a chair and watched her as he always found himself doing.

She was peaceful, something new and comforting. She didn't toss and turn, but just slept until he made the mistake of standing. Opening her eyes, she saw his hazy outline.

"Itachi?" she asked, rubbing her tired eyes.

He sat back down and Sakura soon fell asleep again. He was somewhat glad she found reassurance in his presence. However, he knew that she shouldn't. His presence is the one thing she can't count on, because she could never trust him. He couldn't even trust himself.

-

In the morning, Itachi was there, asleep in her chair. She smiled sleepily, something she hadn't done in a while. Letting the cloak fall, she went into the kitchen to make breakfast. It seemed by letting one emotion reveal itself, she brought the others to the surface. Even though she was reluctant, she let them roam in her consciousness for a while.

She felt Itachi's hand grip her own on the pan's handle. "Sit," was all he said.

Sakura was finding him to be quite a homemaker. "You do realize you're a horrible cook."

"Do you think you're better?" he asked quizzically.

Thinking about it, she never had any culinary skills. In her preteen years she was too busy concerned with her looks and a certain boy and in her teenage years she was too busy trying not to get killed in training and perfecting her skills. She never had time to take cooking lessons or anything of the sort. Then again, Itachi was pretty bad.

"Still, I _do _know when the food is done."

He acknowledged Sakura's claim and sat. She hummed softly, and Itachi thought he never heard a more beautiful sound. There was a knock on the door and they both knew it was Naruto. No one else visited anymore. She walked into the living room, and thought about opening the door. Then she remembered she was mad.

"Sakura, I know you're not going to let me in," Naruto called. Outside, he was leaning against the cold wood, wondering what he was going to say. "I…I'm stupid. So, _so _stupid for everything I did. Sasuke, too. And even Kakashi. The only one who used their brain was you. You were always the smart one, and always knew what to do. The three of us…we didn't. That's why we all left. We were all lost and trying to find something. I was trying to find strength, Sasuke was trying to find revenge, and Kakashi…he was trying to find a family. But you…_you _knew you had everything you needed right here. So you stayed like we should have."

Sakura leaned her head against the door, and shut her eyes. Naruto had changed, she could tell, and she listened to his words as if they would save her.

"So…please don't hate us. And please don't be mad. What am I saying…of course you should be mad, but…" Naruto struggled for the words. "I guess I'm trying to say, give me a second chance. And Sasuke. And forgive Kakashi. Open up, Sakura."

She backed away. _Open up_? After all this time, he expected her to _open up_? She ran into her bathroom, looking for something she can use. There were only aspirins and other medications, towels and soaps. She went into the kitchen and looked at the burner on the stove. It may be different, but it was still a form of release. She pushed up her sleeve, but Itachi grabbed her arm. She felt the tears, and willed them away. She wouldn't cry, not after all of this time. Itachi pulled her into an embrace and she decided to let the tears come. She didn't stop until the food was burnt.

-

Naruto had remained in front of the house. He leaned against the door, sleeping, and fell in when Itachi opened it. He gasped and stood, forming the hand seals for a jutsu.

"I'm not here for you," the Akatsuki said, and Naruto halted the jutsu. "Come in."

He knew it was a command and entered. The two sat in the living room. Itachi turned the broken television off. It was uncomfortable and awkward.

"What-"

"I'm not answering any questions," Itachi said coldly, and Naruto shut his mouth at his tone. "I only want to tell you that no matter what she says, she wants you to keep trying."

He looked at the Akatsuki. "I…think I understand. But how do you know this?" The blonde remember what Itachi told him and said," I just hope I can do something."

"No one can do anything," Itachi said. "Only she can help herself."

Naruto thought about it. He was right. Leaving, he knew he wasn't going to tell anyone about Itachi. He had a feeling that he wasn't going to do anything bad. Said Akatsuki walked into Sakura's room and sat in what became his chair, watching the girl with tears on her face.

Nothing ever looked so beautiful.

-

**(A/N) So, how'd you like it? I decided to divide it up in shorter sections. Did you think it was extremely stupid? Horrible? Tell me in a review for Thanksgiving leftovers!**


	5. Where the Blame Lies

**(A/N) Sorry it's a bit late. This verse is so small; I don't even think it's a verse. I was going to include the chorus, but I felt otherwise. Not worth it. The last chapter was my favorite verse (even though when I posted it, the structure was messed up), so I enjoyed writing it. I actually love every single one. There are about four chapters left (I'm including the very end, which is pretty garbled).**

**Disclaimer: It's pretty obvious I don't own Naruto or Painted.**

**Painted**

**Where the Blame Lies**

_Well I hate _

_Pouring my heart out_

_When it's fading fast_

_And streaming down your leg._

The weeks walked past nonchalantly, stopping here and there to watch a broken girl struggle. She was mourning in a way, and she was trying not to let anything in. Her bed was her home and refuge, and the killer never left her side. In his mind he was telling her to stand, go up to Naruto, and knock him out with the power of her master. Whoever said anything was possible, never met Sakura Haruno.

"Why did you stay?"

Her hands were reaching up, searching for something neither of them saw. They soon fell, and she turned over in the sheets. The sun glared through the window, and she squinted.

"You told me to."

He studied her form, memorizing its curves and its lines, every intricate detail that his eyes traced. He would remember this because it would soon disappear like everything before. No moment lasts, and no life is perfect.

"Why did you listen?"

She turned to him, her tears acting as glue for her hair to stick to her face. Her eyes were jaded and tired, and all he wanted to do was to make her pure again. He wanted her to return, and he knew he was being selfish.

"I don't have a choice."

He did, but she didn't have to know. It was a secret he kept between himself, a pretty lie that comforted him. If he ever let himself believe it, he could sever all of the worthless bonds he created. But he chose the truth and people that he hated for the sake of this girl and village.

"Where did you put everything you stole from me?"

Sakura was very inquisitive, and Itachi didn't mind. "I hid them."

"Where?"

"Do you really expect me to tell you?"

She sighed. The breath was empty and forlorn. "I guess not."

There was an empty silence. Itachi couldn't stand it. Whenever he was around her, he wanted to tell her everything. Whenever he saw her frail body, he wanted to speak the truth. It was dangerous for him to be with her, but she was a magnet that pulled sadness, hurt, and a killer into her.

"I won't always be here."

Those words could kill. He didn't need a knife, or any sort of blade. All he needed was that simple admission. Itachi knew how much that sentence tore her apart. Sakura could feel the words burn any hope that was struggling to grow.

"Again," she said hollowly. "Like everyone else."

_Yes,_ he thought. _Like everyone else. _He was no better than her team. Worse, in fact. Naruto would stay, and there was a chance Sasuke would come back. He, however, would never remain.

"Trust in Naruto," Itachi said.

Sakura, with her broken eyes and broken body, stared at him with a broken gaze. "Never again."

He let himself smile, but only a bit. And it was not a true smile. "Then how do you expect to survive?"

"Are you forgetting, Itachi?" Her voice was broken. "I don't want to survive. The only thing keeping me here is you."

Itachi needed to stay. He was foolish for getting himself in this predicament. Foolish for showing up in her room that night. He was not foolish, however, for stopping her. That was the smartest thing he had done. However, he was going to do something much more foolish than any of those. Something stupid, wonderful, and all around complicated.

He was going to make her feel.

He kissed her.

Pushing her down into the tear-ridden sheets, his lips touched hers in an unbefitting way of a killer. He wasn't supposed to be gentle. His hands weren't supposed to be so soft. But they were, and it was all Sakura could do not to shatter under his touch. _Feel, _he thought, hoping his words could reach her through his lips. _If only this once, feel me. _And she did, even though she didn't want to. It wasn't only his physical touch, but his very being. She felt him, and everything that made and molded him.

Sakura let herself respond to Itachi, let her fingers crawl to his scalp. She felt him, and he tasted her. It was a horrible, beautiful union. They betrayed everything they came to be, and let themselves become what they wanted. And in breathing, free of the other's grasp, they knew that life could only be so perfect.

-

"Has she…been like this for a while?"

Naruto sat with the Hokage in her office. He was brooding, and the woman laughed at his severe expression. He looked like the Third, with his face all wrinkled.

"I'm afraid so," Tsunade responded. "She looks okay for a normal girl, but for her…she's too weak. She stopped training a while ago and only got weaker. That's not the only noticeable difference."

They looked at each other in understanding. Their Sakura was fading. Just like her namesake, she blossomed for a short time, and withered away. They couldn't bring her back. They couldn't have their kunoici in their eyes again. This angered Naruto to the point of destruction.

"What the hell happened?" he asked himself in a hoarse voice. "Where did we go wrong?"

"You didn't go anywhere wrong," Tsunade said, pouring her beloved sake into a cup. The liquid was her favorite companion. "It's the fact that you went."

He blamed himself. Everything that happened to Sakura, he blamed it on all his mistakes. It was his way of thinking. He had a tendency to push the blame onto his shoulders, even when it was only partly his fault. The rest of the fault belonged to time and its slow burn.

-

"He's out there again."

Sakura sat at the window, staring at her old friend. Naruto stood on the stoop, looking at the door awkwardly.

"Do you think he'll actually open the door this time?" she asked, looking at Itachi.

"Do you want him to?"

Looking at Naruto, she saw it clearly. He wanted her to open the door. He wanted her to show him it's alright and she's ready to let him in. She walked over and touched the knob, looking at Itachi for reassurance. He said nothing and she opened the door. The blonde looked up, shocked that the thing he had his eyes fixated on moved. He was hesitant. She walked away, leaving the door open.

Itachi didn't bother hiding as Naruto entered. There was no need to. They both gave a nod of acknowledgment.

The aspirant hokage bent his head, realizing he hadn't prepared a fantastic speech to sway his friend. "What do I say?" he asked the Akatsuki.

"Anything," Itachi replied. "As long as you say something."

Naruto nodded again, taking a deep breath as if he was preparing to dunk his head underwater. He walked into the kitchen and saw Sakura sitting on the counter. Neither said anything. He tried to look anywhere but at her gaunt face.

"Are you going to try and help me?" she asked, a tinge of resentment in her voice.

"No," Naruto said, remembering Itachi's words. "I'm just going to stand by you…like I should have. I promise."

She smiled bitterly. "How can I know you won't leave?"

"It's my nindo. I never go back-"

"On your word," she finished.

He smiled, and she caught a glimpse of his former self. His signature gesture of putting his thumb up as reassurance. His bright eyes and smile that inspired so many hearts.

"All of these years," Naruto said, his smile slowly fading. "I've been looking for Sasuke. And I won't give up."

He found himself in a dilemma. This was when his nindo backfired. If he stayed with Sakura, he couldn't search for Sasuke. He knew, no matter how selfish it was, he was more concerned with finding Sasuke for himself. However, the one friend he could locate needed him and the Uchiha didn't.

"For now, I'll just take a break," Naruto said.

-

Naruto did not anticipate how hard taking a break would be. He was itching to go back and continue his search for his long lost friend, who left behind his village and headband.

"You know, you don't have to stay in the house," Sakura said, looking at him fidgeting on the couch. "Go train or something."

"No," he replied, turning on the broken television and grimacing. "I'm staying-"

"I said get the hell out!"

Naruto's teeth chattered, but he smiled. Sakura's old personality was beginning to shine through. He ran out of the apartment for show, and laughed along the way. She laughed along with him, and felt better. After closing the door, she looked around for Itachi. He was nowhere to be found, but she didn't worry. He often disappeared and she was used to it.

Besides, she had someone else to stand by her.

-

Itachi didn't regret many things. He didn't regret killing his clan (_he had good reasons_), he didn't regret leaving his brother (_he would become strong_), and he didn't regret joining the Akatsuki (_no matter how despicable they were_). However, one girl made him regret so many things. And all he wanted to do was heal her and feel the strength she used to have. He knew he couldn't, though. He knew that if he went back to her, he'd surrender everything he built.

"Where have you been, Itachi?" Kisame asked him.

Itachi didn't acknowledge him and didn't need to. They were preparing to go to Konoha. The kyuubi was their target, and oddly, Itachi felt like he was betraying some form of trust. He was a fool. Even as they entered the village, the feeling didn't subside. When they found the blonde, he still couldn't shake that sentiment.

"I knew you were coming," Naruto said.

So did the ANBU. The battle began.

-

Sakura swallowed, standing in front of the door. A wooden plank never looked so intimidating. She was half praying he wasn't there, and half hoping he was. She knocked. Naruto didn't answer. She breathed out in relief. He was gone and she decided to wander. It was twilight, the stars peaking out shyly from behind clouds. She found herself at team seven's old training ground. Discarded shuriken and kunai lay forlornly. She picked one up and for once, didn't want to place it against her skin.

Dropping it she walked over to the dummies, stroking the marks made by enthusiastic rookies and trained ninja. Her heart ached as she saw the memories on the ground. They surfaced and seemed to happen anew right in front of her. It turned out to be another battle, occurring some ways off. She ran over to the clanging noise of metal, knowing she should be heading in the opposite direction.

"Naruto!" Sakura screamed as she saw him. Her hands moved to her mouth when she saw Itachi.

She wasn't surprised. She couldn't be, but the girl knew she couldn't lie to herself. She never accepted that he was the enemy. She trusted him and the fact that he'd stay. She let herself slowly come together, and seeing him made her want to tear herself apart again. She deserved it. She was foolish for letting herself be deceived again. Itachi never said he'd stay forever; he would never always be in that chair, watching over her with wounded eyes.

Itachi saw her balk, and he did the same. The ANBU was coming at him with a katana. The Akatsuki dropped his own. The sound of metal piercing his flesh made him unfathomably happy. The last thing he saw was her face, slowly fading to a dismal black. It was a pleasant sight to die to.

-

**(A/N) Cliffy! YAYZ! MUAHAHA!**

**Deidara: Clyde-chan didn't take her meds today, did she, un?**

**Kisame: -Holds up bottle- Crap. She needs a refill.**

**WOOT, I'm back in action! I hope you enjoyed this, even though it's short. The next chapter may be longer. I dunno yet. So…I really don't have anything to say. Review for…a flag! I just joined color guard. **


	6. Neglecting Corpses

**(A/N) God, sorry it's so late. My computer had a super massive meltdown and it took a shitload of software to fix. I have so many problems with my computer; I'm just bad with technology. Anyway, if you're waiting for the next Mikadzuki chapter, I don't know when I'll have it up. I'm almost finished the chapter, and I'm debating what stays in it and what goes. Sorry about the lateness.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything pertaining to Naruto or Evans Blue.**

**Painted**

**Neglecting Corpses**

_She whispers in his ear (Don't hurt me). Don't hurt me, (Don't forget me) don't forget 't hurt me, I'm still not put back together. _

Sakura waited with an anxiety she was becoming accustomed to. Naruto had sent her home with a sympathetic hug. "Trust me," he whispered. She was beginning to hate those words. Trying not to remember the light escaping Itachi's eyes as he hit the ground, she thought of everything that occurred around his corpse. His partner turning tail after the ANBU grabbed his flaccid body, Naruto finding her and cursing silently, and everything coming down hard on her. She didn't know where Naruto was as she sat in Itachi's chair, looking out the open window, caught in a staring contest with the moon.

"Psst."

In her delirium, Sakura thought the whisper came from the orb hanging in the sky. Then, she saw a shock of blonde hair peaking above the sill.

"Naruto?" she asked.

"Yeah, yeah." It was the same voice. "Come with me."

Sakura walked over to the window and rested her hands on the edge. Another hand reached up and grabbed it, pulling her through the hole. A pair of arms caught her, and she looked up into a pair of mischievous blue eyes. Naruto set Sakura down, not releasing her hand, and dragged her through the streets of Konoha. They soon ran through the doors of the Hokage's office.

The room had been turned into a makeshift hospital. The decrepit Tsunade stood hunched over a gurney as a green glow came from her hands. Sakura gasped when she saw the body.

"What's going on?" she asked, running over to Itachi. "Why are you healing him?"

Tsunade smiled exhaustedly. "I've known Itachi's been visiting you."

Sakura jerked back slightly. Hesitantly, she placed her head against Itachi's chest. A slight heartbeat met her ears.

"It's a funny story," the Hokage continued in good humor. "I was going through some old paperwork the other day, planning to throw it away-" Naruto snorted. "-when I came across something interesting."

Tsunade nodded toward the blonde and he came to Sakura with a piece of paper. She read it with disbelieving eyes, only comprehending fragments. _Uchiha clan_…_coup de`tat against Konohagakure_…_Itachi Uchiha_…_annihilate clan…missing-nin…_

She tried to speak, but the words were lost in her throat.

"Itachi will tell you everything when he wakes up," Tsunade said.

"How do you know he'll tell me?" Sakura asked, dropping the paper. "How do you know…he'll wake up?"

The Hokage became annoyed. "Are you doubting me?!"

Sakura winced. "Sorry. No."

The medic smiled reassuringly at her student.

"Trust me."

Such damning words.

-

It took only one day. No one visited. Tsunade and Sakura took turns healing the Akatsuki. There were no questions and no words spoken. There was only silence and wounds. When Itachi woke up, Sakura gave a small gasp, the same as when she first saw him. The green around her hands dissipated and she flung her arms about him. But then, she drew back and ran from the room.

"Never again," she whispered as she left the building.

Naruto and Tsunade looked at each other, and then Itachi. Itachi's eyes were dark, thinking that he'd much rather be dead than witness Sakura's pain.

"What just happened?" Naruto asked.

Itachi stood and looked at the wall. "I'll be leaving."

"That's not possible," Tsunade said. "The Akatsuki believe you're dead, and we don't want to give them any reason to think otherwise. You are going nowhere."

She kept Itachi in a secret room in her office. A dark and dusty place, but better than the conditions he endured with the Akatsuki. He settled into it thankfully, and wondered about Sakura. He made no promises to her, and told her that he wouldn't always be there. But they both deceived themselves into believing he would. They crashed and burned.

And Sakura didn't have the energy to pick up the remains.

-

Sakura ran, letting the wind catch her worries. Sakura fled right to that training ground to find the littered weapons. She picked one up and breathed heavily. The coldness touched her skin, a welcome feeling to take her mind off of the swirling, mesmerizing distress inside. Even as she gently pressed it against her wrist, she couldn't bring herself to do it. She bowed her head and started to weep, such stupid and ugly tears.

"Damn him," she whispered to the ground.

"Who?"

She knew it was Itachi. It was always him.

"You," she growled. "Why the hell did you even come to me if you were going to leave?"

Itachi didn't need to ponder it. "I was foolish," he said," and in love with you."

She wrapped her arms around herself, as if protecting her body from his words. "If you were, you'd just leave me alone."

"Hence the foolish part," Itachi said, taking a step towards her. "Still, I wouldn't take back a thing."

"Stop," Sakura whispered. She didn't want to hear those words from him. "Just…leave."

"Never again," he said, repeating her venomous words.

He was as close as he could get to her without touching her. She shook minutely, her arms having been lifted to her ears. Itachi knelt before her and removed her hands. She was forced to look into his eyes.

"Do you believe me?" he asked.

She shut her eyes, tears forming despite her hate for them. "I…don't know."

Gently, he brought his lips to hers as a reassurance.

"Tell me when you do."

-

Sakura hated cemeteries. True, this was a memorial stone, but it wasn't the thought of stepping on bones that bothered her. It was the lost memories and secrets, and the overall fact of death that can never be escaped. Even though she wanted to give herself over to the reaper, she still feared it. There was something about death that repelled a lot of people. For her, it was the mystery and the unknown. Death was ambiguous and fearsome. _Like Itachi, _was her fleeting thought.

There were two names she wanted to find. The first one was her once best friend and rival. The name was relatively new, and she dropped the flowers on the stone, thinking about everything that brought her there. She decided it was about time that she paid her friend a visit. There was such a thing as neglecting corpses.

"Sorry, pig," she said, a wistful tone weaving her words. "I should have come sooner."

A harsh breeze rattled her as she said this, and Sakura figured it was Ino's way of slapping her upside the head for not visiting her. She smiled, and moved on to the next corpse. A swell of bitterness erupted in her chest, and she wondered if she should even feel sorry for neglecting him, when he had neglected her for years. She set the flowers below his name, too, and wondered what he really wanted. A family, Naruto had said.

Sakura hoped he found one in them. Despite the fact that he couldn't care less about training her, he still protected her. He was there for her when she needed him, up until the bitter end. The only one of her team that stayed.

"Thanks, sensei," she said.

No breeze that time. Maybe Kakashi was just a little late. Sakura left, wondering where their souls were, perhaps flying above her head, watching her with worried eyes. Even in death, could she hurt them? If so, they must be in more pain than her.

_Am I being selfish?_

-

"Akat- I mean, Itachi, can I speak to you?" Naruto asked, tapping lightly on the hidden door.

It opened to reveal the emotionless nin.

"I just want to ask you something."

Itachi moved aside to let the boy in, and shut the door soon after. Naruto sat on the floor, not finding a chair in the small space.

"Do you think Sakura will…" he couldn't finish, but Itachi knew what he needed to say.

_Kill herself. _The unspoken words hung in the air ominously.

"I don't know," he said, sitting on the mat that served as a bed. "Perhaps."

Naruto shook his head. More than anything, he didn't want to lose her. But he knew there was nothing he can do. He was just one person, as was Itachi, and they couldn't change anyone.

Sakura had to make the decision herself.

-

**(A/N) I liked this chapter because I think it shows how messed up Sakura is. Her freaking out because Itachi left her one time. That's how desperate she is for someone to be with her. After everything she lost, she thought she had a constant and then…poof! It disappears.**

**Mostly when I was writing this chapter I listened to Don't Fear the Reaper by Blue Oyster Cult just for the line "Even though she wanted to give herself over to the reaper, she still feared it." Suiting song for this chapter.**

**So yeah. Sorry for the wait. I hope the next chapter will be up soon. **


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